radoooooomnesss!

This post has no real meaning. i am writing it because i am basically super bored.But its also legendary in a way. Its my first and mostly last post from college(ummmm.. current college) .. there are some shitty presentations happening. i am done with mine in which i had really annoying amount of contribution.(why am i doing bba,remind me again?)

I for a change in days feel jobless and I am loving it..its also special for me in a way because i am sitting next to a person who totally hates reading and writing and is waiting when i get done with this crappy post so he can scribble on paint or log on to facebook and stalk people..i love him..:D

also i am planning this superb evening that i am going to spend all by myself once i am home today. ahhh.. how i wish my parents were out of the house for days like that more often..!

omg! i love this moment..!!

more crap later...!

*tuned into* no promises.

Lesson no. #1245634#

"When I get lonely now, I will think: So BE lonely, divya. Learn your way around loneliness. Make a map of it. Sit with it, for once in your life. Welcome to the human experience. But never again use another person's body or emotions as a scratching post for your own unfulfilled yearnings."

Loneliness is my way of living. Has always been. I like to be left alone. For hours, days, weeks. Even as a kid I enjoyed most when I played "alone". I never had particularly long lasting friends. I have never had a best friend except for my mum who has lasted. And I have always taken full responsibility for it. I do take full responsibility for it.

I am not a people’s person and I don’t even like to sit with a group of people to eat my lunch. I like to watch movies alone. I used to be an agoraphobic when my mother got me to overcome it. So basically I am a lonely person and I am more comfortable being one.

There have been very few instances when I felt "lonely" and felt bad about it. And lately I had the longest phase in which I constantly looked for support. From someone. In some way.i wanted to be taken care of. I wanted my bit of attention. More than I deserve I guess.

I Got close to people who I won’t stick on to. I made them feel like they want the same. When they don’t. They don’t want to really be with me. They want to and should be with someone who will “stay”. And I won’t and I never have “stayed”.

Reading.

Its how I have grown. It has taught me and made me think. I know, I want to know and I know more because I read. When I go astray I think the universe hints me to read that one thing that puts me back on path.

I read and I learnt. I realized what I was doing. And decided to stop. I decided to be alone and be me. To stay with everyone but live alone. And I think that’s what I am supposed to do to make people around me happy.

So, when I get lonely now, I will think: So BE lonely, divya. Learn your way around loneliness. Make a map of it. Sit with it, for once in your life. Welcome to the human experience. But never again use another person's body or emotions as a scratching post for your own unfulfilled yearnings.(EAT PRAY LOVE)

soul mate?!

“At the beginning of creation, men and women were not as they are now; there was just one being, who was rather short, with a body and a neck, but his head had two faces, looking in different directions. It was as if two creatures had been glued back to back, with two sets of sex organs, four legs and four arms.

The Greek gods, however, were jealous, because this creature with four arms could work harder; with its two faces, it was always vigilant and could not be taken by surprise; and its four legs meant that it could stand or walk for long periods at a time without tiring. Even more dangerous was the fact that the creature had two different sets of sex organs and so needed no one else in order to continue reproducing.Zeus, the supreme lord of Olympus, said: “I have a plan to make these mortals lose some of their strength.”And he cut the creature in two with a lightning bolt, thus creating man and woman.

This greatly increased the population of the world, and, at the same time, disoriented and weakened its inhabitants, because now they had to search for their lost half and embrace it and, in that embrace, regain their former strength, their ability to avoid betrayal and the stamina to walk for long periods of time and to withstand hard work. That embrace in which the two bodies re-fuse to become one again is what we call sex”.

-Plato

"A SOUL MATE”. A soul mate is someone who is just like you. A soul mate is someone who knows everything about you. A soul mate is someone who is there no matter what; a soul mate is someone who knows what you want without you saying it. A soul mate is the one who feels your happiness and sorrows over boundaries.

All these definitions were never good enough to make me believe in soul mates. I got my answer to what a soul mate is when I read this.

A person who makes you feel complete not only emotionally but physically. A person who ends your search. A person who is meant to be with you from forever is your soul mate!

It’s one of the most beautiful extract I have ever read about passion, sex and love - the three most important elements for any living thing in this world!

little things.. :)

I believe in running up the success ladder in pencil skirts and floral tops with an iPhone in my perfectly thin hands. Style AND Substance. Why compromise?

I Love cold milk with chocolate in the mornings, a cup of tea in the evening and the smell of rain, anytime of the day.

Movies comfort me. and music gets me going.

New stationery.pizza’s.a well set cupboard. mens wear.Scented candles. A fluffy cotton comforter all year round.

I'm NOT a social animal. I personally think I am agoraphobic bipolar sensitive desperate weirdo with lots of ambitions(I don’t know how that goes along, but I do pretty well).

And I have so much passion, i assure you, you'll be floored.

I can do my own things but I prefer some help from others since I am too lazy.

I just need a little push and help I can do anything and literally anything.

I LOVE surprises. I love flowers especially white ones. They do wonders while impressing me.

I like little gestures of love.

Over time i have learnt romance is about sacrificing and giving a whole lot of you for the relationship. Since I cannot do that I prefer and enjoy my single hood.

I am an open minded , blunt , egoistic bitch and I don’t mind being one.

I love a very few things and people in my life and I am highly possessive about them even though I doubt anyone realizes that.

And I love discovering myself and writing it here so that i read this in a few years and smile.

*tuned into* open skies - parikrama

To Life.. And To Dreams!!

You know how after a tiring day you hit your bed and you cant wait to sleep and you start thinking about all those various things you miss about your lazy days and you sleep off before you know.

That’s what happens with me these days when after a super eventful day at college and then "work" I get to lie down on my bed and before I know I am in my REM sleep and I am drifting away into dreams. It’s a montage of different events that have happened. That I know could have happened. That should happen. And it’s the most beautiful feeling in the world. I see the various countries I want to live in. I see the different guys I have liked. I see the few most important people in my life.i see SO much good that I am no more scared of getting up and seeing it’s no more there. Because I am SO sure it will be all there when I go back to bed the next night. It’s funny how dreams make a negative person like me so optimistic.

Dreaming gives you a reason to live. Dreams are beautiful and make you want to want something real from life. And make me feel OH-SO-SO-SO-Awesome! They give me reasons to change, to initiate, and to feel good.

I have a decent work life. Decent college life. Decent amount of people around me. I am single and in love with more than one thing. I dream about beautiful things and people.

And it’s precisely that part of my 24hrs when I am dreaming that are making my day! My life is still not all ticks on my checklist of a "perfect life" but then today I feel satisfied and I know I will get more eventually.

*tuned into* waiting on the world to change - john mayer.